你写得不错, 我稍稍改了一下, 你看看。
Dear Sir/Madam,
Thank you for your precious time spent in reading this email. I am a Chinese self-study examination student majored in Business Administration. I am an Undergraduate student and I want to (这儿怎么断了?) With a plan for further education and study in this field，and great respect for your university，would you please help me to clarify the following questions?
1、 Does your university accept self-study examination student?
2、 If you can, what are the conditions and what should I prepare for?
Thank you very much for your time and patience again.
Sincerely,
Albee Jiang
