as if career satisfaction is what a man's life is all about.
Even more insulting is the recent media trend of regarding at-home wives as ―status symbols‖ — like an expensive car — flaunted by the supposedly few men who can afford such a luxury. The implication is that men with at-home wives have it easier than those whose wives work outside the home because they have the ―luxury‖ of a full-time housekeeper. In reality, however, the men who are the sole wage earners for their families suffer a lot of stresses. The loss of a job — or even the threat of that happening — is obviously much more difficult when that job is the sole source of income for a family. By the same token, sole wage earners have less flexibility when it comes to leaving unsatisfying careers because of the loss of income such a job change entails. In addition, many husbands work overtime or second jobs to make more needed money for their families. For these men, it is the family that the job supports that makes it all worthwhile. It is the belief that having a mother at home is important to the children, which makes so many men gladly take on the burden of being a sole wage earner.
Today, there is widespread agreement among researchers that the absence of fathers from households causes serious problems for children and, consequently, for society at large. Yet, rather than holding up ―ordinary‖ fathers as positive role models for the dads of tomorrow, too often society has thrown up its hands and decided that traditional fatherhood is at best obsolete and at worst dangerously reactionary. This has left many men questioning the value of their role as fathers.
As a society, we need to realize that fathers are just as important to children as mothers are —not only for financial support, but for emotional support, education and discipline as
well. It is not enough for us merely to recognize that fatherlessness is a problem — to stand beside the grave and mourn the loss of the ―good family man‖ and then try to find someone to replace him (ask anyone who has lost a father though death if that is possible). We must acknowledge how we have devalued fatherhood and work to show men how necessary, how important they are in their children’s lives.
